on a cold morning

I felt attracted the very first time i saw him.. He looked at me, then i looked at him, the first time we were face to face, i felt attached.. He came near me and stood by myside, i couldnt help caressing his hair..It was soft and beautiful, and his meaningful eyes, whenever they touched mine i felt more and more connected.. I walked a little while and he was coming after me. He had a crippled leg, but i wasnt looking at it in order not to embarass him.. I stopped without turning back and he came again, his eyes were asking love..

I got on the bus queue.. He was on the other side of the road, i was looking at him, he was looking at me and everyone was looking at us. He was trying to reach me but the cars were so fast that his crippled leg was a hinderance between us. I realized again, that life must be hard for him.. After a few minutes another dog approached to him and after staring at me some more seconds, he turned back and took off, that was the last time i saw that sweet street dog..

witness

this blue screen,
7/24 drawn curtains,
the changing air,
the increasing heartbeats,
the wooden floor,
our bare feet,
the music in the air,
the music in our ears,
the music in our veins,
our rhythm,
the recording machines
in our head,
the city
witnessed it all..

...

blanks,
yet no gaps,
it has always been hard to write about you,

...

we did so much
we have so much left to do,
so much left to do..

as if..

Sneezing makes your heart stop for a second,
Hick ups,, they do, too..
A high heeled red Cindrella shoe in a wooden box
along with the tenderness
of caring, from far away
increases your heartbeats,
puts a big smile on your face,
fills you with happiness
and makes you count down
as if you are counting down your 10 seconds
to the new year day..

the very first moment of life

That s how all it starts,
The big bang of each of us, every individual..

She had a belly made out of a ball it seemed.. Perfectly round, and i had never seen one like that before. When she opened it and asked me to touch, it felt so weird. You could recognize which part of body it was, he had his bottom there, moving impatiently to say hello the very next day.
How can one sleep if to give a birth the next day, what kind of excitement it is? No matter how we try to imagine, it must be beyond that and one cant understand before "being a mother". I shot her photos till midnight and i am sure she spent the rest of the night without winking her eyes.

I didnt have any notion of tensity but excitement was right there in its place because it would not only be a "first" to her but also to me, because i had never seen a birth before, therefore neither i shot it.

After donating the room with blue baby boy ornaments, we were ready to head to Operating Theatre. First they took her and after wearing greenish doctor clothes i found myself inside, too. It didnt take long for her to fall asleep after being given narcosis.

I starting shooting around inside the room, she was on the operating table at 13.00, caesarean only took 5 minutes.. First i saw the head and it was pulled up, 13.05 someone joined us ! Shaking, unaware, tiny little boy..

I cant express how it feels during all these, the birth process, the time when first the father sees the baby and when the mother takes it into her arms for the first time..
"How soft, how warm he is !"

So baby boy, welcome to life and thanks for being a reason for me to experience this =)

Barcelona feedback

Hola, que tal ?
Okay, i know that it s been a decade since i am back from Barcelona and it seems pointless that i am writing this post now. No, no please listen to me before you click on X on right top of your window.. I have an excuse.. Not that the electricity went out but i have had a guest right after my trip that completely killed my enthusiasm to write about my joy and experiences out there..
Writing blog is like buying a brand new toy and taking it home when you are a child.. I mean what is the sense when you dont rip the box and play it as soon as you are back home. You can easily figure out i like writing as soon as i experience but my guest from overseas came right after i returned and i had to postpone writing day to day which did no good to me, nor to my blog and almost killed it. (not that i blame her)
Anyways, even if i think it is late i felt i couldnt write any other post before posting this one..

1- Culture shock !
As soon as i got out of the airport i took an A1 bus from airport to Plaza Catalunya. And yes in the first few moments of my time in Spain i had my first culture shock. A bus driver with tattoos & piercings + Judas Priest playing in the bus !!! Later on i discovered that all public service workers were no different, the reason i got shocked is in my country all you see is the most "regular" part of people that usually work in such fields. No ! Not that i classify, but wearing piercings / tattoos are considered inappropriate for such occupations.


2- Gaudi
It might seem strange that i put Gaudi second on the list but the public servers were even more surprising sorry.. I fell in love with Gaudi again and again but i guess i am too late because he died years ago and i really am sorry that i didnt have a chance with him..
If it wasnt for him the city may not have been that beautiful.. If you are to visit Barcelona some day dont even conisder skipping any work of him.





3-Peddlers

Yes! They hold the string the whole day and they would make good hunters with such attention and fastness.. Selling fake Gucci's and Prada's is not an easy thing. I give them rights..



The list would go till +-20 but i wont make it long.. I slept 3-4 hours a day not to miss anything and enjoy my best out of the city. Morning time for beach & museums and nights till morning to dance ! Mojitos were tasty and i have met great people, many people all around the world. I especially have to thank Andrea to introduce me to heaps of Catalan people who showed me great hospitality and i dont even mention his hospitality..
And i ve met "someone else" on my return, who i am still to meet but met already..




Bcying is one of the best things about Barcelona, you can take a bike ride some put it on the next corner and take another one whenever you like without worrying about where you parked your bike.. There are bicycle corners in every +-500 meters.. No pollution!



I returned very relaxed and i have no idea how but some kind of inspiration found me and made me speak some Spanish :) + I decided to live in Barcelona for an unknown period of time next year.. You can understand how good the city is from my last sentence..

p.s: not only Barcelona but also the other places i ve visited around were amazing!
and do not forget; traveling alone is a privilege !

Barcelona trip & the wishlist

How soon the day arrived !
I have booked my Barcelona trip some months ago and i always had something to look forward to in the past few months.. Now it s the day and i ll be on my way within a few hours. It kind of feels weird because, that s it, it s the end and it feels like i dont have anything to look forward to now.

People have been asking with whom i am going, i am going with myself, my 3 cameras, a small suitcase and a backpack.. Yeah that s all. I had only one friend whose coming would make me happy but since he climbed to Mount Everest a few months ago he used all his vacation and cant make it. This is an opportunity to make new friends & connections and of course to make new photos :)

I remember when i was at the second grade, i must be 8 then, there was a girl in our class and she would go to Germany in summer vacation. She asked the whole class about what they want from Germany as if she would bring and succeeded to gather all the class around her. You can imagine the wish list..

-Barbie doll
-Action man !
-Bicycle
-Play Doh..

and the list goes by.. I was more clever than i am at that age, i went to a corner and silently watched all that was going on, laughing at the wish list and appreciating Deniz about her success.

Now i hear can you bring this, bring that stuff from people around and it really sounds silly unless they are close friends of mine or some people i like. - I do not mention the acquintances- But most of all i pity people who goes to Tokyo, Dubai, China etc. because the wishlists are like

-Play station 3
-Lap top
-I pod..


I promise i will be back with new photos & memories but i do not promise to buy presents to everybody, i ll be keeping my diary over there and tell you about my observations..

By the way, what would you want from Barcelona ?

----------
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to check out my new concert photos of Björk & Lenny Kravitz
you can step ; http://flickr.com/photos/rainyface or http://rainyface.deviantart.com

La Formula Una

Formula 1 Turkey Grand Prix is approaching !
My dear mum & her friends are up to date about anything, including "la formula una" elections..
2 weeks ago she insisted that i should apply for the election of la formula una..
What is "la formula una" ?
In every country, for each grand prix 10 girls are chosen as a VIP guest ( see my VIP Concept titled blog below) , since %90 consists of male (fans and %100 of racers) female have important figure there at paddock area. What do these girls do ? They keep contact & communication with guests, pilots and other people there, represent their country and enjoy the parties & activities..
What do they require ? To be between 18-30 ages, high level of English is a must, and they have to be sociable and impressive as well as being interested in motor sports.

What was i to do there?
At first it appeared to me as a job. Being sociable, meeting new people in such enviroment sounded exciting, and the chance of being 1/10 of that girls to go to Brazil grand prix was even more exciting..
The problem was that, with my feminist point of view these girls always sounded as beautiful & stupid objects of males to me. Regarding that applications were made through e mail with CV relieved that point of view of mine a bit..
Okay e mail was sent and they returned that there d be an interview in hotel.. I went there, answered their questions and they told me they called 50 applicants out of 2000 & 25 of them would be elected that day, another 25 would go to a party and only 10 would remain.. I had the call and i thought going to party part would be nice and was sure that i wouldnt be in that 10.
The election looked stupid to me since it was declared right there as if it s a beauty contest. It causes disappointment in some people..
In short, i am among these 10 and next week the race will take place. It sounds fun to be partying and meeting with new people, i ll report what happens..

http://www.redbull.com.tr/#page=ArticlePage.1209560321021-390578645.0

http://www.ozgurhaber.com/yonlendir.php?id=2033569&i=Takvim&b=Formula-1'in-10-%FEansl%FD-k%FDz%FD...

p.s: mum is happy now..

schmap

Everybody settle dooown ! OK, it s time to boast now :)

http://www.schmap.com - the travel guide site - asked my permission to submit my photo to their website. I shot that one in Gator Park- Florida. And i permitted them to use it without any commission ..




These days i really am longing for a vacation.. "Aventura" makes me feel as if i am on a seaside and while sipping my mojito, or any other some colorful cocktail with cute little umbrellas, i am gazing at the waves and the bluest see ever..

No, no dont get me wrong i do strongly not recommend that you should listen Aventura, close your eyes and dream. This is dangerous, we still have 3-4 months to relax. Stop reading, stop listening, get back to work. Yes, NOW !

flying in a white dream

I didnt want to wake up, i didnt want to lift my head from my pillow, i didnt want to leave the "far away" , i didnt want to leave the cold weather, i didnt want to leave warmth, even if it was a dream i had an electrical shock throughout my body.. one day, i hope, i believe..

Dreams are nice to haves !

vibration

Ok ! Here comes a confession, i am obsessed with finding things when i lose them. If i can't find the thing i lost, or the thing i forget to say urgently i go mad.
i.e: while going to a concert with friends and mentioning a chocolate's name i suddenly forgot it. Whole night i found myself desperately in need of finding it without making my friends realize it. As soon as we got back home ( at midnight) i turned on the computer and wrote some keywords and google and it found the name for me, so i could sleep in peace.
Another one happened recently, while having a conversation and drinking coffee with a foreign friend of mine i said "..One who knows it" and he said "No, it must be one know know it, it s grammatically incorrect" I went mad because i had been learning this language for so long and i am sure about it. I came home after 2 days staying outside and guess the first thing i did ?
Of course i started google and searched the results for "one who knows" & "one who know" and copied the result 552.000 to 38.000 i won !
See this is an obsession, last night i was trying to find my Spanish notebook and i ended up with being sweaty & tired. At those times i want every belonging of mine to have a vibration. All i need would be a remote control so that i could ring them / press the button like cell phones and hear the beeping / melody which would make me find them easily.

VIP

We all keep seeing "VIP" concept while buying tickets, at the concerts, when we go to a football play etc. we see separate places called VIP. If you are blind enough not to see these places, at least you must be acquainted with BIG boys ( bodyguards ) in front of VIP gates. In short it is
"A Very Important Person, or VIP is a person who is accorded special privileges due to his or her status or importance."
The question is what makes them important and sets the hierarchy. This morning while having my yummy breakfast and watching travel & living channel, a guy called Ian or something visited a business millionaire's ( called Simon Woodroffe or whatever ) floating house in London in the middle of Thames River .. He is the owner of "YO ! Sushi" Ian's duty was to stay with Simon for a week and observe what businessmen do in their lives.
In the morning they woke up at 7 o'clock in freezing London's weather conditions and jumped into the river with their ugly slips. (Which is good for their mind & body in view of Simon's 7/24 hour sports trainer ) After that they had a meditation that required pinching whole their body and keeping bad thoughts and their woes away , ha-ha ! Ian was surprised by this as well.. The next step ; they went to play "real tennis". Simon started;
- This court is the first tennis court built in 20th century in England. I feel and hear as if Henry VIII is playing and shouting around. We call this real tennis because the regular tennis is fool's tennis.
OK STOP!
The first thing is what s the relevance between 20 th C. & Henry the VIII who lived between 1491-1547 ?
Second, Simon's story tells that he was a poor guy and in one night he became a millionaire, so he must have been playing fool's tennis before. Why does it bother him now ?
At that night Simon was having a party for VIP people. When Ian asked what their job was, one by one they were like;
-I have invented balloon Rockets that works via blowing.I am a very important businessman.
-I am personal education training assistant, and these two girls are my students.
and then a guy who looks like 18 appeared..
- I have done many important things in recent years. I work on many things, i work in various kinds of business, but the last few years have been very important.

While it was crossing on my mind "hahahha how old are you", my friend was like " Which grade do you go to?" and Ian happened to say "Did you start the business at the age of 5?"

I have no idea what the very important things (v.i.t's) or what very important people stand for, or what important things these people do to be drinking champagne in the middle of tennis games and how they dare to put the name to tennis game as "fool's tennis" and pinching themselves in order to keep bad things away, any idea ?

A piece of Peace

11.00 : Woken up

11.00-12.15: Turned pc on, put on a few tracks, picked casual home clothes, took shower, sang in the shower ( dont remember the song), put cremes on and made peeling to my face, brushed my teeth, burshed & dried my hair, sat in front of pc.

12.15-13.00: Checked mails, gallery accounts, downloaded the photos from the weekend from my cam to pc,replied messages & felt hungry

13.00-13.20: Prepared breakfast; fresh orange juice, grilled hellim cheese & green olives

13.20-16.04: Downloaded music including Telefon tel Aviv remixes, Vaya con Dios, Sigur Ros and some more Abba, started reading ilker's blog I have been reading the archive for 2 days but still i m in October 2005. Meanwhile i made a 10 second banana milk and honey mixture with Magic Bullet (800ml) That'is it.. yes ! PEACE ..

milk, music, blog.. everything that i need today.
Highly recommended !

16.16 : Finished writing this blog
full stop

Oh telly !

"I look and i see hundreds, no no thousands of televisions everyday, they are big, i have seen one as big as this building, they really are all big.. Yes ! Thousands, there are. Whenever i want to see Bugs Bunny, it is Spiderman playing on.. I can't ever see Bugs. "
said the kid..
"Do you like Spider Man that much ?" i asked..
While holding his familiarly colored plastic Spiderman toy, he replied;
"Yes, i like it very much. And there are always televisions around. Hundreds, thousands, i see them.. " stopped for a second and went on;
"We have stairs that climb to space at home"
"Have you ever climbed ? Ever reached there ?" asked i ,
"Yes, yes i did.. Televisions, everywhere, hundreds,thousands"

"Telly not only harms kids' eyes, but also their brains.. " i once read, and confirmed again in a shopping mall while conversing with a 5 year old boy today.

happy new year..

The NYE has been a "freestyle" one indeed.. Didn't plan much, nor did i keep my expectations high but i had quite a lot of fun !
It has been a fruitful year for me in some aspects such as getting more and more experienced with the things i am interested in such as business life. The most fruitful part was the cultural one, been to many concerts and performances thanks to my job, started to earn from photography which is really of importance to me.. Met many many people especially in business life rather than the social one. Met very few people that i have a lot of things in common and share the same world view. Had shared further things with my inner circle..
Now there is this "brand new year"
Made no plans at all, no resolutions, totally a freestyle one for now but i am sure significant resolutions are on their way to crash me, new aims, new interests, new new new..
I am glad i don't feel obliged to make new decisions in the very beginning of the new year, it makes me feel even more relieved and peaceful.
Wish the very best for you all , the countdown has already started..
good luck ! =)